Dear Athena, as you are, of course, aware, we gods are often called upon to wear many wreaths. You yourself are a multifaceted deity: you’ve got your wisdom, your crafts, your strategy. Artemis has got hunting, wild animals and chastity; Hestia’s got the hearth, home and cooking; Apollo’s got almost everything under the sun – including the sun, in fact! We each have all these strings to our bow, but I bet every one of us could name their favourite discipline, or at least their ‘main’ one anyway.
My main thing is rainbows, which is pretty special. However, part of what makes rainbows so special is that they are a rare thing, a glimpse of colour and light after a grey day, a shimmering symbol that appears when you most need a reminder that there is always some hope, some happiness to be found. Not wanting to be branded as one of those lazy one-trick pony divinities, I thought I’d better find something to do on those days when the sun is shining, which is how I came to be a messenger for the gods.
There are many things I like about the role: I get to be useful and helpful, I’m always in the know, I like how people/god-facing it is, it’s varied, it keeps me active, I could go on and on. What’s difficult is that I barely get a moment to myself. I’m constantly at someone’s beck and call. I can’t even relax writing to you because I have a funny feeling that any moment now Hera’s going to send me off to see Hypnos – again! It would be ironic if the next person to request my services was you.
One thing I’ve noticed about being a messenger is that I rarely get asked to deliver good news. People don’t mind doing that themselves. The number of difficult conversations that I have had to have – I’ll leave you to imagine what it was like telling Menelaus that Helen had gone off to Troy…
Although this isn’t the eternity I imagined for myself I enjoy it, I really do. However, I must admit that it’s pretty galling to spend the majority of my time passing on other people’s news, and stories and instructions, and not even even be the main deity associated with the job. I’m concerned that I’ve become too absorbed in a realm that isn’t mine, that I might lose some of the colour and magic that makes me me if I keep going this way.
By the time a rainbow day rolls around I often feel depleted, exhausted. I worry that the arches aren’t as bright as they used to be, that, like me, they’re losing their glow. I realise it’s not much of a complaint in the grand scheme of things, and I really am happy enough. But should I be asking for more? It’s important for me to give my all, but I’m starting to think that I need to keep something back for myself. The trouble is that I don’t know how. -putting_up_with_the_rain
Athena says: Taking an interest in anything new as a god is a terribly hazardous prospect. You say that you like something and suddenly you’re stuck being its patron for the rest of time.
I hope you’ll be pleased to hear that reading your letter has really made me think about the times I have deemed it necessary to make use of our divine messenger service. I shall continue to bear this in mind at future newsworthy moments. I feel I should point out that ‘Dear Athena’ correspondence is not conducted in this way. We largely use owls.
It’s funny that you mention my dear aunt Hestia because it seems to me that the two of you are rather alike. You are both able – no, more than that – you both actively try to think of others, to help them, to put them first. Qualities which set you apart from the rest of us selfish lot.
However, while these traits are indeed admirable, I fear that they may be the cause of your current problem. It’s easy to over-extend when you’re being helpful, to spend so much time thinking of others that you struggle to focus on, or even identify, your own wants and needs.
I think it’s very important that you start dedicating some time to being ‘lazy’
Now, I don’t think you’re going to be thrilled by my first suggestion, but I think it’s very important that you start dedicating some time to being ‘lazy’. Much as you love working on your rainbows, the key thing to remember is that they are part of your work and that you need to take a proper break sometimes. I want you to start consciously taking a moment to do something that is neither messenger-duty, nor making a rainbow. Although, given what we both know about how easily a new interest can take over one’s immortality, I would suggest keeping any new hobbies a secret, at least at first.
The last thing I want is to add to your already extensive to-do list. I realise that it’s going to be incredibly difficult to find a time when you will not be disturbed, so I urge you not to give this little task your all, much as you might want to. Just do what you can, when you can.
That being said, we do need to address the fact that you are struggling to get any time to yourself. If I were advising a mortal I’d say ‘communicate’ ‘set boundaries’ ‘compromise’, but we both know that sort of talk just isn’t going to fly with our fellow gods. Not all of them at any rate…
It’s about time that you received some official recognition for all the work that you do as a messenger
After all, as you allude to in your letter, you are not the only divine messenger. While I don’t believe it would be possible to persuade a whole pantheon to respect your working hours, I think that you do have a chance with one god. I also think that it is about time that you received some official recognition for all the work that you do in the messenger department. I see no reason why you and Hermes can’t figure out a way to divide the role in a way that suits you both. Hopefully then you will find your work patterns at least slightly more predictable.
These adjustments will certainly make your life easier, and I have no doubt that they will help to keep you ‘happy enough’, but I think, as you say, that we can do a little better than that. After all, if a goddess can only manage partial contentment, then what on Gaia can mortals hope to aspire to?
The way I see it, pure happiness is a bit like one of your rainbows. If we were in a state of total bliss all the time, then some of joy’s brightness would begin to fade. Just as we need a full climate of weather, so also must we feel a whole spectrum of emotion. The difference being, of course, that while we cannot control what’s happening in the sky (admittedly you do actually have power over some of it, but for the sake of my analogy I am choosing to ignore this), we are able to seek out and forge our own moments of elation. ‘Happy enough’ is fine for the every day, but we all deserve a little more sometimes.
Consider this your permission to let go, to focus on yourself, to have fun.
You devote so much of your energy to other people, even in your moments of ‘down-time’ you remind them that there is colour, positivity and magic in the world. It would be a tragedy if you came to forget this yourself. You already know that immortality isn’t all about work, that’s why you reached out to me, but I think that for some reason you feel the need to be told that you are allowed to enjoy yourself. So consider this your permission to let go, to focus on yourself, to have fun.
This may seem more of an overwhelming than a delightful prospect at first, so I’ll start you off. For someone with your penchant for bright colours, I think that taking up a new craft could be a good option, or maybe an ambrosia date with a friend, you could try listening to your favourite poet, even making a day trip out of the next place that a message takes you.
These effervescent moments of happiness will re-energise you as you carry out your regular tasks, they might even allow you to remember why you liked them in the first place. So, quickly, before anyone can summon you, get out there and start looking for a rainbow of your own, whatever that may turn out to be.
Dear Athena 