Dear Athena

The characters of Classical mythology do not have it easy. If only there was someone they could turn to for advice, like an agony aunt, or a goddess...

How do I stop a god in his tracks? (Daphne)

By

TW// Contains reference to sexual violence

.

.

.

.

Dear Athena,

I am currently trying to outrun a god, your half-brother in fact. I’m sure you can guess why. He simply won’t take no for an answer, and once I realised that he was going to resort to violence and force, I just started running. I’m exhausted and getting slower by the second, but I’m terrified of what will happen if I stop. Is there any way that I can get out of this? Please help. – Legcramp_Laurel.

Athena says: Let me start off by saying how sorry I am that this has happened to you. You may be aware that I am all too familiar with the horrifying onslaught of a lecherous god. You have my deepest sympathies.

But let’s not beat about the bush, you need advice, and you need it fast! It’s incredibly impressive that you have managed to outrun the deity in question all this time, but we all know that you can’t go on forever. Unfortunately, the fact that he hasn’t been able to catch you means that he will only become more determined to do so.

My suggestion is strange and truly transformative

On the plus side, I am determined that he will not be able to do you any harm and, given my credentials, I feel confident in my ability to succeed in a battle of wills, regardless of the divine status of my opponent. But how can we trip him up? I have only one suggestion, and I’ll be honest, I’m branching out a bit with this one; it is strange – and truly transformative – but I believe it is your only hope of escape.

As soon as you feel the last ounce of your strength begin to fade, I want you to pray to Gaia. Pray like you’ve never prayed before. Pray as though your life depends on it (it sort of does). Pray with every drop of devotion that you can muster to be turned into a tree.

Pray with every drop of devotion you can muster to be turned into a tree

Now, I know what you’re thinking, but go with me on this, it will certainly make him stop short. You will remain unassailed, untouched, forever out of his reach. Not only a symbol of hope, but an evergreen reminder of his failure. More than that, you will have eternal rest and repose to recover from your ordeal. You will never need to run, never need to hide, never need to fear again. You will remain beautiful and alive, as one with the delights of nature.

This is not an easy choice to make, and you barely have time to catch your breath let alone a moment to consider it. Whatever your decision is, it must be made quickly. In the mean time, may you be filled with the courage, speed and determination you need to carry on. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.