Dear Athena

Dear Athena,

I woke up this morning to find myself alone on an unfamiliar island, abandoned by a man for whom I had left my home, betrayed my family, sacrificed everything. And now he has tossed me aside. I am no longer of any use to him. I have no way of leaving, nowhere to go if I had, and my foolish heart is broken. What should I do? – AbandonedonNaxos

Athena says: What a colossal ****** (I’ll allow my readers to insert the pejorative of their choice here)! I cannot believe how these supposed ‘heroes’ treat those who help them. I am utterly outraged on your behalf.

You have very kindly left the man in question nameless, but I (of course) know exactly who he is and, in case this is of any consolation, he shows the same disregard for his promises and lack of care to all those he professes to love. He sent his own father to his watery grave through his self-centred thoughtlessness.

Now, as sorry as we feel for the old drowned king, it is your situation that I am here to deal with. It is clear that you are more than aware of how badly you have been treated, so I do not need to spend time convincing you that this was not a man with whom you would have wanted to live out the rest of your days.

However, just because you know that he abused your generosity, trust and affection, does not mean that all the emotional energy you spent on him was worthless. You loved this man, and that is not insignificant. I would urge you to allow yourself to feel everything that your heart and soul are trying to feel. Yes, you are angry, you’re furious to the point of disbelief, but you are probably also sad, maybe even disappointed. So tear your hair out, call him every name under the sun, cry until you have no more tears left to spill. Let it all out now so that, when the time is right, you can give your full focus to yourself and your future.

And it is to your future that I shall now turn. A life alone on an unknown island is certainly a daunting, if not terrifying prospect, but perhaps it could also be called exciting. No matter how you approach it, it will take time for this new reality to sink in, after all, this cannot be what you imagined your destiny would hold. The first thing that I must point out, is that this island does not have to remain unknown and unfamiliar. It is yours to discover, and make your own. When you are ready, you can begin to explore, to find out what your new home has to offer you. Once you have a better idea of where you are, you will also be in a better place to make your plans and lay the groundwork for your new existence.

You may be afraid of the loneliness looming over your solitary life, and it is a cause for concern. If you concentrate on what is there in your world, rather than what you have lost or left behind, you may find that companionship, solace, and contentment can come in many different forms. That is not to say that you should forget what you are missing altogether. Indeed, trips down memory lane may be one of the ways in which you strike back against solitude. However you cope, bear in mind that your isolation is not necessarily permanent. You never know when your island may have visitors to its shores.

The most important thing for you to remember as you grapple with grief and face your future is that you are bold and strong and full of feeling. You had the courage to follow your heart and strike out away from your home, and you have the courage the deal with this new challenge. Draw on that inner strength as you start to build a life for yourself. A life over which you now have sole control. Where will you take your story?